What I Want for Christmas

For starters. let me tell you what I do have. I have a beautiful wife and a wonderful family. I live in a comfortable home regardless of the weather, have charming neighbors & great friends, and my dog loves me. I have savings, health insurance, more clothes than I need, enough electronic devices to start a pawn shop, and can travel anywhere on the three B's (bike, bus, and beemer).

What do I need? Not much, actually. I was thinking of chucking my mobile, but the little lady wants to be able to track me via GPS should I hike the Appalachian Trail or have a sudden onset of Alzheimer's. I could use new exercise clothes. I have some now, but one of my charming neighbors thought my black baggy outfit made me look like M.C. Hammer. I could use a backpack to carry "whatever" while I tool around downtown on my bike. I guess I could use a plastic bag, but that carries an entirely different identity downtown. However, if I get none of these, it's no big deal.

So, what do I want for Christmas? I want my soon-to-born grandson to be healthy. I want the wars wherever they are to end. I want everyone who wants a job to have one that fits their skills. And, most of all I want to stop wanting. I will need to learn to accept what I have is enough and trust the the Good Lord will give me what I need.

That being said, here's hoping you get what you want or better-what you need this Christmas.

Happy Holidays from Downtown Indy

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Dickens must have been thinking of us.

We started off the year with Julie being diagnosed with breast cancer. Whoa! Wait a minute. That's the worst of times? It sure felt like it at first for me and the kids, but we cannot begin to tell you the love and support we received from so many friends and family. Every time we had a need, someone was there. Julie experienced all of the ups and downs...surgery, chemo, radiation, and the associated fatigue one would expect. However, she also felt blessed to have found "it" early, had great doctors (including Jo, Joel's fiance', and Brian), great caregivers at IU, and hundreds of prayers on her behalf. She is still a quart low in the energy department, but still does more than two people drinking Red Bulls. She is continuing to become more deeply involved at the IU School of Nursing. Somehow, I knew that was going to happen. But, she is in the right place at the right time for the two of us. IU and the health care world are fortunate to have her passion and expertise.

Myself? I retired on Sept 30th (thank you my love). After 37 years in the graphic arts biz, I was "well" done. I am just getting into my new life, so allow me some time to decide what I plan to do. Right now, I rant on my blog, AskIndyTed, and do whatever Julie thinks I am qualified to do. So far, cooking is not one of them. I still fantasize about walking the Appalachian Trial. We'll see.

Kyle is still loving and living in NYC. He moved to Brooklyn last year and is exploring the possibility of owning rather than renting. If anyone has info on Kyle, please let us know. He likes to keep us all guessing. All we know is he's single, handsome, talented, charming, and a wonderful son. Look for his newest production on CBS College Sports (Dish Channel 152) on December 18th. The show is about Billy Cannon who won the Heisman in 1959 and was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame in 2008. By the way, Kyle is a great storyteller.

If you didn't notice in paragraph two, Joel is engaged to a wonderful woman named Jo Chien! She is a breast oncologist at UCSF Medical Center. Google her and be amazed. Speaking of Google, Joel continues to play an important operations management role for Google Apps. This letter is a Doc which is one of the Apps. Confused? Google it. You'll find the information. Moving on, they are getting "hitched" (Do they say that in CA?) on May 1st in the Santa Cruz Mountains. If you didn't have the opportunity to meet Jo's family at our home over Thanksgiving, they are a delight! Don't Google them. There is way too much info on their accomplishments. It will crash the servers.

Brian, Brooke, Parker, and Finley are anxiously awaiting the arrival of Harrison sometime around New Year's Day. The stork will have his work cut out. Harrison is huge! As for the rest of the family, all you need to do is read Brooke's blog, www.thethreeolives.com. It tells it all. Let me just say that B & B are doing a great job. Brian continues his anesthesia residency with the possibility of focusing on pain management. Meanwhile, Brooke continues to be a great Mom and more. I haven't seen the likes of her since my own Julie. Hang in there Brooke-only 2 1/2 more years of residency.

All in all, we are truly blessed. We hit a few chuckholes along the way in 2009, but we have each other. What else could you need? So, when your times are a little rough, may you and yours be reminded to hug and appreciate each other in celebration of the birth of Christ as the true joy and meaning of this Christmas season!

Being Merried

No, that isn't a typo. I am talking about what I have had some difficulty with from time to time. You see, I've become a bit of a curmudgeon in my later years. I imagine it is a bit of an aversion to experiencing disappointment. Please understand, I just retired as a salesperson. In sales, rejection is a daily occurrence and you become a bit hardened as a means of self-preservation. Sometimes, after a long hard series of rejections, you are just not a lot of fun.

But, I'm getting off the subject, which is to find a way to become a "light" instead of a Captain Dark Cloud. This past weekend, I had my very own "It's a Wonderful Life" experience. You see, I have been in a royal funk over the past few years--frustrated with the way "things" have turned out. There's no reason to re-hash my past. Let's just say it was not what I had envisioned for myself.

Then, last weekend, we threw a party!

Over a hundred friends, family, and neighbors came to our home to celebrate the engagement of Joel (my second oldest) to a wonderful woman named Jo. It was quite an event in our small downtown condo. There was conversation, laughter, hugging, kissing, great food, stories, and me--feeling just like Jimmy Stewart at the end of the movie. It does not matter what has happened in your life. It only matters that people care.

So, feeling a little down? Hug someone. 'Tis the season for "Being Merried".

Litterbugs

I was recently fortunate to travel across the pond to visit the Queen and her subjects. And, I must say, London seems to really have its act together. The city is absolutely beautiful, rich with history, fast-paced (I've never seen people walk that fast), polite, well-dressed, and VOID of litter. I'm not kidding! No trash anywhere except in the few hard to find trash receptacles.

Why would I notice? Because, I live on a busy city street in Indy when folks seems to think it is quite appropriate to toss whatever they like on the ground. What is even more amazing is that most litter is comprised of a fairly limited variety. So, here's my list and a few suggestions.

1) Cigarette butts. Please swallow them when done. I feel like I'm touching your lips every time I pick one up.

2) Snack bags. Do you realize that the half-life of a snack bag is longer than a human life? Stop eating this crap and you'll live longer in a cleaner environment.

3) Candy wrappers. Eat all of the candy you want. My brother is a dentist and he could use the business, but please stick the wrapper in you pocket and let your dog sniff it when you get home.

4) Hostess Twinkie, Ho-Ho, Cupcake, and any thing with a creme or fruit filling wrappers. Have you ever read what is in them? Your first clue should be the way they spell "creme". It's not really cream. It's an emulsion of chemicals they had leftover after making window caulk. Is that what you're doing? Caulking your pie hole?

5) Soft drink bottles. If you're thirsty, drink water. When the bottle is empty, fill it up and use it again.

6) Plastic shopping bags. Instead of taking out the aforementioned items and throwing them on the ground followed by the bag, keep the bag. Then, put your trash in it and carry it to the closest receptacle.

Better yet, don't buy any of these diabetic/heart disease time bombs. Take your slimmer self to the bank and buy a CD instead.

Freekin' Flying

I have not yet forgotten the trauma of my San Francisco debacle with Airtran Airlines and what do I do? I climbed aboard another aluminum flying tube with a different logo pasted to its side headed to London. This time US Airways is the culprit.

The leftovers of Tropical Depression Ida have been slowly working their way from the Gulf Coast north to the New England area. Up here, they do not call them tropical depressions. They refer to them as Noreasters. Thats' slang for it is raining and blowing like hell form the northeast. Or, in my case, it means I am sitting in a hotel for 24 hours in Philadelphia rather than my luxury suite in London next to Hyde Park.

I know US Airways is not responsible for the weather, but they are accountable for treating me like livestock riding up I-65 on a semi-trailer headed for the International Beef Packing Company outside of Logansport to become next week's deli sandwich. How can they expect me to return as a customer when they offered no notification of my flight delay, no assistance to stow my luggage from a nasty flight attendant that Julie almost decked, no options when my connection was in doubt, no chance of making my connection by having the London flight leave EARLY before its scheduled time, no reasonable effort to get me on another flight, no eye contact as they told us we'd have to wait and get on a flight a freakin' 24 hours later, and finally offering me their condolences on an 8 1/2 X 11 piece of paper that offered to put me up in an EconoSludge in ghetto-Philly..at my cost no less.

So, heads up American Airlines in February and Southwest in April. All I want is a tad more humanity, a smile, on-time arrival, a Diet Coke, and a little bit of legroom. Hold the peanuts!

Thermostat Control

Who is in control of the thermostat in your abode? If you are a man, you are in control. If not, buy a skirt. No self-respecting man ever relinquishes control of the one thing that women are incapable of understanding.

Oh, I sense the ladies are not happy I could make such a claim?Well, answer these questions:

(True or False)

1) Will raising the thermostat setting by five degrees warm the house up faster?

2) Will lowering the thermostat five degrees cool the house down sooner?

3) Can you properly adjust the settings on a programmable thermostat?

4) Does it make you uncomfortable to have the house temperature set at 55 degrees during the winter when you leave town for a few days?

5) Are you going through menopause?

6) Did your husband kill ants with a magnifying glass when he was young?

Correct Answers:

1) False. The furnace can only warm the house as fast as he can "heat" you up. It takes awhile.

2) False. I think I just cooled down my wife.

3) False. You should stick to cooking, cleaning, and bringing home a paycheck. Leave the technical stuff to your hubby.

4) If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there, does it make a noise? Same concept. If you don't get it, leave the thermostat alone!

5) It depends. If you have messed with the thermostat in the last 24 hours, you are in menopause.

6) If so, he understands thermo stuff. Need I say more?

Oh, BTW, the same goes for the car.

Bicycling Downtown Indy

I no longer have a car of my own! When I hung it up a month ago, I turned in the keys to my "free" company car and walked home. The office is only three blocks away, but it was a one-way strut into retirement from working and having my own set of wheels.

However, I have a couple of sons who have shown me the light of living without owning a carbon dioxide-belching American icon.

My oldest, Kyle, lives in New York City where having a car is more of an inconvienence and expense that he can live without. Besides, the Metro can get you anywhere in about thirty minutes if you don't mind walking a couple of blocks to the station only to descend into a grimy subterranean and somewhat odoriferous underground. But, it works and it's cheaper than a taxi.

My other son, Joel, lives in beautiful and just as pricey San Francisco. You can get around in the Bay Area in a car as long as you do not need to park it. Parking is a sport in San Fran. You must be able to track Google Maps on your iPhone, talk to the old man(that would be me), and drive 80mph without having a high-speed collision in the morning fog. He prefers the Google Shuttle and it's free(that's my boy!)! When he needs a car, he either rents one by the hour or mooches his sweetie's wheels.

So, what am I to do in Indy? We have no subways or shuttles (unless you live in Hamilton County), but we do have IndyGo. It can take you anywhere as long as you are not in a hurry and you need to go to a suburban mall. IndyGo is an incomplete answer to Indy's urban sprawl and low population density, but I am getting off the subject. How do I get around town?

On my bike! Indy is not New York or San Fran, but just about everything you need is within a 10 minute ride on a bicycle. The streets are wide and the sidewalks are plentiful albeit illegal as I found out on a Sunday while cruising around downtown before a Colts game. I almost received two tickets from the police because I wasn't willing to play chicken in the street with a bunch of drunks driving scores of re-cycled school buses painted blue with "Go Colts" painted on the side.

Anyway, it's good exercise and it makes the neighbors giggle when I peddle by. And heaven knows, people need a reason to laugh. It's my new job.

Wi$hard Ho$pital Re-Do

I'm either paranoid or I am just starting to figure out why Indianapolis proposes a major construction project just as another one comes to completion.

Case in point. Remember when the Hoosier/RCA Dome was built in the early '80's? Well, our fair Mayor Hudnut felt, and rightfully so, that Downtown Indianapolis needed a kick in the pants. So, he proactively proposed building the Dome with the enormous help of the Lilly and Krannert Foundations even though we had no promise of landing the Colts or numerous NCAA events. It cost the city less than $40 million (and a 1% restaurant tax). It was a GREAT deal. The downtown immediately began to change for the better. On the bad side, we also got the Irsay's. Mayor Hudnut also made the choice to use union labor on the condition that they promised to never strike as a tool to negotiate during its construction.

However, just like the greedy bankers in NYC, the locals saw an opportunity to squeeze a lot of cash out of the local citizens of Indianapolis. Soon after the dome, we landed the Pan Am Games in 1984. Subsequently, we built the Natatorium, the Velodrome, the Track & Field Stadium, and upgraded numerous facilities using Hunt Construction and Wilhelm Construction, the same folks who built the Dome.

In the meantime, the bonds for the Dome were being paid down rapidly by the 1% food tax, so Hudnut decided to roll them over and add onto the Convention Center. Thus, since it was connected to the Dome, the tax would not expire and Hunt, Wilhelm, and the unions had a meal ticket extension. Not to drag this out, but we soon had new buildings all over the IUPUI Campus, Conseco Arena, Lucas Oil Stadium, a new billion dollar airport terminal, and a new $300 million addition to the convention center being built on the land where the RCA Dome once stood with a $48 million debt that was built in 1980 for less than $40 million. Hmm, something stinks.

Now, we have forked over about $25 million to help a billionaire build a new hotel across the street from the convention center. So, what do all of these projects have in common? Nearly all were all built by Hunt or Wilhelm with union labor at increasingly ridiculous costs. Moreover, none of these government funded buildings pay a dime in taxes. Meanwhile, the hotel, rental car, local income, property, and food taxes have all increased dramatically as people like the Irsay's have increased their wealth. The Colts are now valued around $1 billion. Next time they threaten to leave, I'll help load the Mayflower van.

Which brings me to Wi$hard Ho$pital's proposal to build a new $700 million facility. The current building is tired and out-of-date. But, the city would be the guarantor of $600 million of new bonds. Looks like Hunt, Wilhelm, and the trade unions are going to have plenty of work. The taxpayers? They are getting lots of new debt and taxes, but we get to vote on this one.

I hope to see you at the polls on November 3rd. It's your money.

Everyday is Saturday

I love Saturdays. Who in heaven's name doesn't? It is the day that you can do whatever needs to be done or more importantly what you want to do. College football (IU-ugh!), sleeping in (with my sweetie), eating breakfast out at your favorite restaurant (City Cafe'), working in the yard (Not me! I live in a condo), or driving to the place where you fell in love (Admit it. You've been there).

Well, in my current situation, I am "voluntarily retired". So, I am in the training phase of living everyday as if it is Saturday until I screw it up by doing something else. Why would I screw up Saturday? Well, it is human nature to change the status quo. So, what is Saturday when you "drop out:? Well, yesterday was the day after Friday, today is Saturday,and tomorrow will be the day before Sunday .I still feel as if two days from now it will be Monday and you all know that Monday is not a favorite of the masses. What am I to do?

Enjoy it! After 37 years of chasing the buck, I am looking for something else to spend my remaining time before the Grim Reaper comes knocking. But, before I make any rash decisions, I am not doing anything except enjoy the illusion that today is Saturday.

And I'm lovin' it!